help me.......im rotting and dying by the second. I have no idea what to do or where to go. All my shopping buddies are either preoccpied or they're out of town. maybe its time i found some new ones. help me.....rot rot...rot rot......rot rot.....rot rot......rot rot......rot rot....rot rot......rot rot.....rot rot.....rot rot....rot rot........rot rot......rot rot.........GET ME OUT

almost every conversation i start with a guy ends up talking about dating ._.
WELL, im the date specialist and you guys who need some tips on dating can consult me for just 10 bucks per hour. i will make your date so special that the girl will go goo-goo gaa-gaa over you.
so dont hesitate, consult Dr. Love today!

I was surfing the net when i came across this website about knowing the opposite gender better. A dumb block like me would never harbour the thought about knowing girls more, much less what they think and stuff. So i gave the website a chance, and kept on reading, and reading, and reading, freaking interesting.

who gives a damn about what girls are thinking? and i thought all they think would be clothes, shoes and handbags. to even consider the fact that they talk about boys behind our backs freaks me out. like, whats so nice in a boy?

okay so i explored more, and i found a section where everyone except me loves - love!
it talked about loads of shit, like the guy, how to get your girl and stuff. One particular fact which really annoys me is, WHY CANT THEY JUST TELL THE GUY THAT THEY LIKE THE FREAKING DUDE. all i see on the web is, 7 ways to tell she likes you, 10 ways you she's into you, there wasn't even paragraph that mentioned - she simply told you so.

hints hints hints, all i see is the word hints that keeps popping up. life would be so much easier if they did it the "guy" way, and to think society was equal.

I'd rather turn gay.

grow hair grow. grow hair grow.

After all, I guess some things arent meant to be let go of. you walk away, then it comes back to you, always there, always haunting. and you so hard, but it never fails to bug you, to come back into your thoughts. and it sucks.

michael lai's getting girl tips

i was having a conversation with michael lai when he started getting into the topic of GBR fomr the topic on menopause. so he asked me if i knew how to get a girl, and i conviniently replied "no", which is so darn true, and thus the lai theory was born. honestly, i think this is just the norm, its not really a lai theory but he believes its really limited to him only, so yah. here it goes.


michaelái says:
u dun nid to be gd lookin to get a gf la plz
michaelái says:
there are nerds wif pretty girlfriends n u r not a nerd
michaelái says:
and nerds are ugly also
michaelái says:
so its fair for all
michaelái says:
except im cute la gaga
michaelái says:
haha
All his promises shall come to past. says:
..
All his promises shall come to past. says:
so how
All his promises shall come to past. says:
u are supposed to teach me

THE LAI THEORY

Step 1

michaelái says:
make frens
michaelái says:
the first thing

well yeah, thats the first step right. make friends. you sure as hell do not go up to some girl that you dont even know to be your girlfriend right?

Step 2

All his promises shall come to past. says:
then
michaelái says:
thn approach her by askin her to go out
michaelái says:
this is basic la
All his promises shall come to past. says:
WHAT
All his promises shall come to past. says:
THAT IS BASIC

man that is basic? darn asking a girl out is the worst thing anyone can go through. how can that be the basic thing? shit man im seriously hopeless, welcome to the bachelor's club.

Step 3


All his promises shall come to past. says:
then next
michaelái says:
veri risky
michaelái says:
thn keep askin her to go out also
michaelái says:
maybe by watchin movie
michaelái says:
thn when betta already follow her shopping
michaelái says:
by tht time she will noe u lyk her la hah

so well, you keep doing the worst thing on earth. and by following her around shopping she knows that you like her? man, i never knew that. shopping with women stinks, you get so bored that you would rather go for the breakup. maybe with the girl you like is a different thing...

Step 4


All his promises shall come to past. says:
then?!
michaelái says:
thn can already
All his promises shall come to past. says:
...
michaelái says:
the rest up to ur capabilities haha

its good luck boy.


we've come to the end of michael lai's get-a-girl tricks. hope you get your girl!

All she ever wanted was for someone to love and cherish her, to accept her for who she is. And yet such a basic duty you could not even fulfill, then what the hell are you? if not a useless jerk.

Chapter 15 - Homeostasis - negative feedback

the holidays are killing me. i cant feel the excitement that the o's are finally over, man this is so wrong. like everyone's cooped up at home, and no one wants to go out. and we have limited places to go to, darn i wish there were more interesting places to go.

speaking about limited places, ive noticed that there is a serious shortage of....

this is stupid, i would like to have more troubles.

its not good to be jealous

im so freaking jealous...that Mr K that got to dance with Miss. W. darn him darn him darn him...

ahhh....she's dropdead gorgeous

ahh...darn it man, E is dropdead gorgeous.

well okay lets see, it all began beacuse of p. darn posters and all, its like man, the more you see her, the more pretty she becomes. ahhh....

now you guys dont get the wrong idea that im perverse. damn i was only referring to the face...ahhh....E..E...why are you so pretty?

i cant wait man, to see the ball part. the stills were already...ahh damn it, she was picture perfect! well the same goes for the gala premiere, on the red carpet. she wore this whatever you call it, sequin gown? man!...and that curly hair....ahhh....

oh no this is bad...to think im gushing over some teen star. but well wth, nobody cares anyway....E!!! singapore start hosting gala premieres too, for internationally acclaimed movies only.

i am so jealous of that guy who played the roll whereby he danced with her in the movie. darn it ill buy the sticker book and start collecting pictures man. you twits out there can go and have your canton pop stars, ahh....daze daze daze...

i will be the founder of the E_____ fan club. i hope im the only fan though, then ill get all her attention, yeah the solo E club. the only club with 1 fan!

stop dreaming abt E....stop stop....ahhh.....

some people think im going insane with those nonsensical posts recently. let me assure my 2 fans that there is nothing wrong with me, nothing is bothering me and i am not upset over anything.
its been wild these few days, staying up late has done some screwing to my brain, the neurones are mixed up and blah blah blah, and studying steel was one hell of a chapter. my words to Mr. Steel : you can jolly well use your stinking moustache and wipe the choc off my butt.

4 more days and "freedom" comes, its not really freedom, given the definition of freedom from my perspective. I sure as hell have many thoughts in my mind, you know what I mean, i have many titles circulating in my retarded little head. ah crap my paragraphing is so poor, like the topic sentences are all jumbled up, well, who gives a damn, english is over.

okay see lately there has been rampant thanksgiving, okay its time i gave thanks too.
"thanks".

"wEeE lUrBbbE eUuuU" - stinking alt caps, learn the word class darn it.

come on guys, look beyond the physical. there's no point dwelling on the ironies of life.

If u fail, pick yourself up and try again.

There's so much more to life than roxy, quiksilver, ripcurl and billabong. and there's definately so much more than getting into a relationship.

stretch your thinking and stop imitating the world, for what is in itself does not see itself.

you can do it yeah!

no this is bad, this is really bad. I think im losing it, im losing it big time. I want it back, want it back. concentrate.

Hey mean lie, im so in love with you, just 2 more weeks. gotta do it with style and finesse baby!

Mean lie.